I just want to be really good at everything. I want to be able to draw whatever I want whenever I want and have it be relatively identifiable, relatively reasonable to hang on a wall and have people understand why or wonder how someone could have expressed themselves in such a way.

How did she move the pen in such a way? That’s done in pencil?

So basically I want to be an expert without all of the work involved. I want to go instantly to the last step, but really that is not an option. That is never an option. It takes work. It takes one step at a time, one baby step, usually– and sure, some people are born with it. Sure, some people can pick up a pen in just doodle a Picasso in their free time– but most of us can’t. That’s nothing new– I’ve seen it in my dreams, you know, those places where our unfulfilled dreams dwell by themselves (I believe more in Freud than that other thing that said we relive our days in dreams– house cleaning, was it called? But dreams definitely mean something).

So when that girl draws behind me in my math class, I’m in awe. How? How does she do that?